Flashback

Ever get hit with a memory out of nowhere?   Yeah, it happens a lot to me, too.  I probably shouldn't refer to this particular case as a 'flashback', since it's not recollection of psychological trauma or anything, but whatever.  It still works as a title.

I sometimes feel like I have a pretty strange brain, but since I'm not one to carry the delusion of being a super mutant form of human, I'm almost convinced that it's just like most everyone else's.  I remember certain times, events and facts from long ago as if they were a photograph that I see when I close my eyes.  Strange memories that don't seem to hold a lot of meaning, but there they are, claiming precious space in my head.  Really, though, sometimes I can't recall what I ate for breakfast yesterday.  I remember the names of very few people in high school, but remember loads from second grade.  No rhyme or reason, just what sticks, I suppose.

We were driving in the car from running errands today and I was torturing Husband by singing very loudly to an 80's hair band song.  It's a terrible song, but it makes me happy due to the attachment of good times that's associated with the era.   Then, out of the blue, I remembered another song that I absolutely adored.  I'd forgotten it even existed for many years and hadn't heard it in ages, but there I was,  mouthing the words as if it were playing out loud.

So I raced home and went straight to look it up on YouTube, thinking that hearing it would make me remember what made me love it so much.  After all, it owned my heart at about eleven (maybe early twelve) years of age, and it's a strange tune for a kid at that age and time period to love. (This is not entirely surprising, I was a pretty odd child)    I anticipated hating it and saying to myself, "You were a freak, what the hell were you thinking??", but after listening to it again, I totally get why I loved those lyrics.  Gosh, there are big parts of me that haven't really changed that much deep down inside.  I like that, it makes me smile.  

I was transported to being that kid who sang along to those lyrics with feeling and was just sure that she knew exactly what they meant (after all, I was eleven going on thirty-nine).  Who knows, just maybe I did…. who am I to judge Little Me?   I suppose it really doesn't matter now one way or the other.   Some things just are.  They don't have to mean anything or make sense…. believe me, that's been a doozy of a concept to wrap my brain around my entire life.  I'm still working on grasping that one.

So, I'd pretty much be an asshole for not posting the song now after all of that… but it did cross my mind to refrain from doing so.   You may wish I had, as general opinion of it here at home have been,  "JESUS, I HATE THAT SONG!  WHY THE HELL ARE YOU PLAYING THAT SHIT??"
But I don't care.  Nope, I'll just play it again.    Really, never let me know you are annoyed by something I'm thoroughly enjoying, I'll never stop doing it just to pay you back for trying to rain on my parade.

Happy Saturday, folks.  Here's some Supertramp.  Take it.